Mark has 355 LinkedIn friends and 453 Facebook friends.  He is an active member of two professional groups, attends church weekly, coaches his son’s soccer team, and gets along well with his colleagues at work. So, when we ask him to name his closest friends, we are a bit surprised by his response.  Mark becomes thoughtful and quiet for a moment. Then he mentions a group of friends he sees a couple of times a month, and eventually names two people he would consider close. Suddenly he is a bit embarrassed.  Despite being focused in many areas of his work and home life, it is clear to him that he has not given his core network much attention or strategy.

Recent studies underscore that the people with whom we surround ourselves have a tremendous influence on who we will become and what we will achieve. Our closest online and face-to-face connections powerfully influence our career success, health, finances, even our charitable involvement and generosity towards others. When we do not give careful attention to choosing those who will influence us the very most, we can unwittingly set ourselves up for a significant, continuing, disadvantage in life.  In one fascinating study, Nicolas Christakis reported that if your friend grows obese, you have a 57% chance of becoming obese yourself during the same time period!

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